I don’t think I’ve had too many double-post days, but this is one of them. It might even turn out to be a triple-post day, we’ll see. As I’ve mentioned before, the obstinate spouse has basically zero credibility. You just simply cannot trust anything they say to be completely true, nor can you expect any plan that they articulate to actually manifest.
Recently I learned that my wife was planning on moving in with the adulterer. This apparently happened last a couple of weeks ago when she was visiting his place while his daughter (ack!) was there with her husband. The atmosphere was emotionally charged, I guess, and the adulterer tearfully asked her to move in. Or so it seems, from what I’ve pieced together. I mean, I wasn’t there, I’m just dealing with leaky walls of secrecy and an occasionally hyperactive grapevine.
This afternoon, I learned that she is now looking for an apartment again. You see? Plan B turns into Plan C, then to Plan D, and then to Plan E, and then back to Plan D again. Wait a minute, let me back up. Plan A was to move in with the adulterer on or about January 1st, to be rid of me, the entirety of our life together, etc., and on to a new life with a moral reprobate. Brilliant. Problem is, the moral reprobate felt it was too fast. (Hmmm, for some reason I’m hearing that old Mötley Crüe song “Too Fast for Love” in my mind right now, not sure why.) So this necessitated a plan B, and that turned out to be the plan to move in with the friends that she is currently staying with. So that was going to happen on January 1st instead. It actually didn’t happen until January 9th, though. She was only going to be there for the month of January, and then from February it would be on to Plan C, which was to stay with this older Japanese lady, in her basement, for this month. Her various boxes of belongings were going to end up in that basement, too, awaiting eventual deployment to Camp Chickenshit. Well, February 1st rolled around, and nothing changed. Here we are, 16 days into February, and she’s still with Plan B. She’s been at that house for 5 weeks.
So Plan C never happened, but roughly coterminous with this idea was the hatching of Plan D, which was to find an apartment. She began to do that, and although I don’t know the exact circumstances, the adulterer seems to have gotten antsy and asked her just to move in with him, timeline 2-3 weeks, i.e. around the end of this month. That would be Plan E as in, I don’t know, escape? Then today she had another session with the “energy worker.” I guess I’ll find out later from her what state her chakras were in. My guess is that they were in bad shape, energy imbalances, etc.; I’d see no reason for any of that to have changed, since her life and actions haven’t fundamentally moved away from immoral behaviors that are extremely draining. These will be her undoing, of course, but that’s the topic of some other post, perhaps. After the last session with the “energy worker,” her behavior toward me changed: it became softer, more patient, and supposedly more concerned with me and my emotions. That lasted maybe 5 days. As such, it was thus nothing other than manipulative from my standpoint, of course. My other guess is that the “energy worker” told her again not to rush into anything, that moving in with this man suddenly would be bad, bad, bad. Well, moving in with him at any time would be bad, bad, bad, baaaaaad. So that puts her back to Plan D, as in, ummm, well, dislocate, or something.
This means that now I’ve got a couple of extra weeks to keep the gentle heat applied and see if anything evolves. Her actually moving into an apartment would be a huge effort and a major manifestation of her dysfunctional ego. She does have a process, and I feel that, on some level, that process right now is recognizing how dysfunctional her ego, her personality, and her life has become. It’s a course of self-destruction that is fundamentally not positive. She is clearly holding on to her agenda for dear life, and not yet ready to give up the fairy tale that is the adulterous relationship. But we all know that relationship will end.
There will almost certainly be another stay at Camp Chickenshit this weekend, and I suspect there will be some tense moments as the future is discussed, the results of the chakra-realignment session (or whatever it was) is talked about, the memories of the counseling session are raised again, and so on. I suspect the adulterer will begin to feel insecure and possibly even threatened. I suspect there will be an increase in tension that may eventually manifest as disagreements and eventually escalate to full-fledged arguments. All there needs to be, as I’ve said before, is one good argument between them, one bona fide barn-burner and it will be game over for that relationship. In my mind’s eye, I envision this as being truly heated, with things being thrown and broken. I know she’s capable of this when she’s pissed off enough, I’ve seen it with my own eyes.
On top of that, there is the curious situation of her parents’ recent actions, as well as the other various pressures that she is likely feeling from the real world as it continues to express itself. The real world, the one in which the rest of us live, is a force that cannot be ignored. It presents bills that need to be paid, food that needs to be bought and cooked, dogs that need to be walked in the dark in a dodgy area, dissertations that need to be written, and so forth. You just can’t ignore that stuff.
As for me, I have a vision. My vision is of reconciliation. As impossible as it sounds, my timeline doesn’t really extend much beyond next month. Don’t ask me why, it’s just a hunch. I’ve had intuitive feelings about various dates in the past, and in almost every case something important has happened on them. I haven’t had too many clear feelings about dates recently, and this is perhaps because I haven’t been thinking about it too much. But for some reason February 26 and March 19 stand out to me as important somehow. Don’t quote me on this, though, okay? I’m not psychic, after all, at least as far as I know It just seems like important things will happen on those days.
Time will tell. I’m prepared to wait. I have plenty of patience and lots of perseverance. I will prevail, of that I am certain.